Friday, November 2, 2012

Fox News Reports President Obama Caused Hurricane Sandy to Divert Attention From His Failing Campaign

News That Didn’t Happen, But Could Have

Reporting on the devastation caused by hurricane Sandy in the northeast several Fox News reporters claimed they had exclusive proof that the hurricane was developed by Obama campaign workers.  The purpose of this ‘October Weather Surprise” according to Fox was to shift attention to the President and to focus on his duties as CEO of the nation.

“We know the Chicago machine created this storm” said on Fox News reporter, and “we know they let her loose at what they thought was the opportune time to get maximum election advantage.”  The reports on Fox News did not provide any evidence for the claims, but several commentators said the evidence was overwhelming.  “I mean, what is more credible, that mother Nature made this storm or that the Obama campaign is responsible” said Fox News anchor Brit Hume. 

As far as the death and destruction is concerned, Fox News commentator and former Presidential candidate Mike Huckabee said that the storm was “proof the devil is on the side of the Obama team and that God favored Mitt Romney”.  Mr. Huckabee declined to say that the hurricane was a way of Nature punishing America for allowing abortions, stating that “There is no definitive evidence that is the case, but that the coincidence of Sandy and Roe v. Wade was pretty convincing”.

Former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin had a guest commentary on the Fox channels.  She opined that while “I cannot see Sandy from my house” she was sure that the fact that Sandy harmed mostly Democratic leaning areas was the result of those states not being in the Republican column.  “No hurricane has ever gone through Kansas” she noted, and “isn’t it clear the reason for that is the straight Republican ticket that Kansans have voted recently.”

Later Ms. Palin was asked about all the hurricanes that hit Republican Florida and she replied that questions like that were just "another example of the lame stream media trying to bring facts into the discussion to confuse people."

Senators John McCain and Lindsay Graham issued a joint statement, read on Fox News, that sated in part that “Sandy is a result of U. S. military weakness and that the U. S. should immediately put plans in place to invade hurricane Sandy”.  The two war mongers went on to add that “had we invaded hurricane Katrina when it first formed it would never have dared harm New Orleans.”

Finally, GOP Presidential candidate Mitt Romney declared that while President Obama had gone around the country apologizing to hurricane Sandy, he was of the position of “No Apologies to hurricanes” and that if elected his tax cuts would prevent future hurricanes from forming.

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