Monday, August 27, 2012

David Frum Celebrates Diversity at the GOP Convention - 11 Prime Time Speakers – 5 Women – 5 Minorities

And Even Includes the First Lady of Puerto Rico!

Here’s a very difficult final exam question in  Political Science 101.  List at least five policies of the Republican Party that are supportive of the goals and aspirations of women and minorities.  (Extra credit if you can name just one).  And here is the easiest final exam question for Poly Sci 101.  List at least 500 policies of the Republican Party that are detrimental to the goals and aspirations of women and minorities.

So it is no surprise that when the Republican party went to select their prime time lineup of speakers for their convention they had trouble finding Republican women and minorities who would fill the spots.  But they managed to do it.  So from David Frum we now have the convention lineup for prime time.

Eleven prime-time speakers at the Republican national convention. Five of them women. Five of them minorities.
Monday, August 27, 2012 – PRIMETIME LINE UP
• Governor Nikki Haley (SC)
• Governor Mike Huckabee
• Governor Jeb Bush
Tuesday, August 28, 2012 – PRIMETIME LINE UP
• Mrs. Ann Romney
• Mrs. Luce Vela Fortuno, First Lady of Puerto Rico
• Governor Chris Christie (NJ)
Wednesday, August 29, 2012 – PRIMETIME LINE UP
• Former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice
• Governor Susana Martinez (NM)
• Vice presidential nominee Rep. Paul Ryan
Thursday, August 30, 2012 – PRIMETIME LINE UP
U.S. Senator Marco Rubio
• Governor Mitt Romney

Wow, what a lineup!  They were even able to locate an African American! And notice that on Tuesday night we have the First Lady of Puerto Rico.  Now we do not know anything about Ms. Luce Vela Fortuno, and we can only assume that she is a decent, caring and loving person of great accomplishment.  But if anyone wonders why she is speaking, the answer is probably something like this fabricated story.

As Republican leaders planned their convention speakers they noticed that they had run out of women/Hispanic members of the party.  The group panicked, wondering what they were going to do when one member said that while he was not sure, he thought that maybe the wife of the Governor of Puerto Rico was a woman and an Hispanic.  After considerable research the group determined that was indeed the case, and designated Ms. Fortuno as a prime time speaker. 

Greatly relieved, several members noted that Ms. Fortuno filled two requirements. She was female and she had an Hispanic name.  More than one was quoted as saying that her selection as a speaker would surely convince almost all Hispanics to vote Republican and to ignore Republican support for laws that demand papers of Hispanics and want to throw every one of them in jail for being suspected of being the in country illegally.

As they left the meeting one member of the Republican leadership said “You know, we don’t have to fool all of the people all of the time, just 51% of them one day in November”.

Yep, that’s probably how it went.     

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