Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Conservatives in the United States Harshly Condemn British Plans to Provide Birth Control for Badgers

Argue That Next There Will be Attempts to Prevent Unlimited Procreation by Cats and Dogs

News That Didn’t Happen, But Could

In England it seems they are having a problem because badgers are (A) carriers of a disease known as bTb which seriously affects cattle and (B) the badgers are reproducing in an uncontrolled way.

Large badger causes 'hysteria' at girls' school
Another victim of Godless liberal policies on birth control
Badgers?  We don't need no stink'in badgers!

David Heath, the Environment Minister, announced a number of measures to make the UK bTB free within 25 years. He said one of the reasons the disease is spreading is because of an “overpopulation” of badgers.

He said the "super excreters" of bTB spread the disease between herds of cattle and as a result should be culled and fertility control administered.

 Britain has engaged in a program to murder badgers,

Around 5,000 badgers are due to be killed this summer in Gloucestershire and Somerset and up to 100,000 could be killed over 25 years.

But as that is rather a cruel practice, the government is looking into other ways to control the population of badgers.

Defra is currently funding research into a “pill” or oral contraception for badgers as well as studies of injectable contraceptives.

Conservatives in the United States have been quick to react to the proposal to force contraception onto badgers.

Washington July 6 (AP).  A coalition of conservative activists today denounced the proposal to control the badger population Britain with contraceptives.  “We think this violates the freedom  all unborn badgers should have” said a spokesperson, adding “we think this is particularly bad policy since the badgers will be given contraception without their knowledge of approval.  Some of these badgers may be teenaged badgers whose parents need to be involved in the decision to give them access to birth control.”

The conservatives went on to warn that “While we don’t think contraception requirements for badgers is a part of Obamacare, it is clear that is the next step and that unless we stop this practice now, mandatory contraction access for badgers will be a part of the law next time, and a morning after pill for badgers would be made available without a prescription.  Just think, young teenage badgers will be able to get birth control medication without their parent’s knowledge.”

Using the ‘slippery slope’ argument the group said that “Not only are we concerned about the rights of unborn badgers, we think this action will lead to attempts to control cat and dog population by making spaying and neutering widely available.”  When told that spaying and neutering was widely available for household pets, the group responded by saying that “see, that’s what happens when you provide and support contraception for badgers.”

Finally, the group said that it hoped the Supreme Court would address the issue in a proposed case, Badger vs. Wade.

Yep, this could happen. 

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