Panic!! Wall Street Journal Editors Run Out of Topics

Everything They Criticized When Obama Was President the Republicans Are Doing

A recent meeting of the WSJ editorial writers went someting like this.


Ed Writers:  Okay we think it's time for aother piece criticizing giving immunity to Clinton people.

Staff:  No can do.  Now that Trump's former NSA man Flynn wants immunity and now that Trump is in favor of it means we cannot write about how asking for immunity should mean automatic conviction.  We cannot say anything on this subject until a new Democratic party scandal comes up.

Ed Writers:  Well then how about a big condemnation of Russia.

Staff:  That's out.  Russia was Trump's biggest supporter, probably interfered enough in the election to get him elected.  They were on our side, or at least on the Republican side which you guys know is our side.  Yeah,  Trump is down on them now but tomorrow he may change and then we'd be in real trouble if we weren't toadying up to him.  Can't touch Russia, Trump changes too much.

Ed Writers:  We know, what about cutting taxes, that should be fine with our Republican lackeys.

Staff:  Not today, the Republicans are talking about a value added tax and a carbon tax.  We have to get on board or they will not invite us to golf with Trump's valet at a public course in Vero Beach.

Ed Writers:  What about health care, can't we write about how Obamacare is going to fail?

Staff:  Sorry, most Americans feel that Trump and his cohorts own health care now.  If we write about Obamacare failing our readers will think we want Trump to fail and for everyone to blame it on Trump.  That's probably going to happen anyway but we can't be a part of it.

Ed Writers:  Deficits?

Staff:  Well a bunch of Republicans have said they no longer care about balancing the budget if that means they cannot cut taxes on rich people.  In fact, Trump himself is expecting a trillion dollar personal tax cut and if we go on about deficits Trump may feel we are taking money out of his pocket and you know how he wants government to put money into, not out of his pocket.  Why do you think he ran?

Ed Writers:  The Wall, we can write about how it will protect America.

Staff:  Not today, seems most of our readers want more immigration so they can have more servants from the poorer countries and more brainiacs from the places that educated them.  If we fight immigration we will be anti-business and if it's one thing we want to project it's pro corporations.

Ed. Writers:  Don't we hate Assad, how aboutg a nice condemnation?

Staff:  Sorry, nobody knows that administration's thinking on Assad, one day for, the next day against.  We might get lucky and suppot Assad on a day Trump supports Assad, but if we don't he will tweet how we support a vicious dictator who may be our best friend.

Ed Writers:  So what do we do?

Staff:  Just leave the editorial page blank.  That represents our thinking.