Dear Donald: Letters to Trumpie only This Site Has

For Reasons That Are Obvious

Dear Donald:

Please let me go back on TV.  I done all the lying like you taught me and now a bunch of shows won’t have me on.  I need the attention, I need to advertise Ivanka’s clothes, I need my interview fix.

Grovingly yours,

KC in the White House

Dear Donald:

Now that you are going to allow us coal miners to finish polluting the state of West Virginia, come on down and celebrate with us.  P. S.  Bring you own water, our'n ain’t fit to drink although we aren’t telling the people that, you know how they take things like that the wrong way.  Double P. S. My companies owe millions in taxes, so you can see I am a true believer in  your methods.

Pollutingly yours,

Gov. Justice (ain’t that ironic) in W. Va.

Dear Donald:

I am a transgender from male to female.  I understand you will not let me use the bathroom of my gender identity.  Thanks for making my life a living nightmare.  May your soul rot in hell you miserable bastard for the agony you will cause me and my fellow transgender teens.

Affectionately and appreciatively yours,

Trans in Carolina

Dear Donald:

About those sanction Flynn promised would be lifted.  Not heard from you recently.  Please don’t make me get all KGB on you ass.

Hugs and kisses, 

V. P. in Moscow

Dear Donald:

You have our support 100%.  We could not have succeeded without you.  Keep doing what you are doing.

Gratefully yours,

Writers Group, Stephen Colbert Show

Dear Donald:

It’s okay if you stay in Washington next week, or next month or actually whenever.  We ae getting along fine without you.  Just wanted to remind you that your son’s name is Barron.

Spousely yours,

Melly in Manhattan

Dear Donald:

Don’t take this the wrong way but our Parliament doesn’t want you to visit.  In fact, I think I speak for most of Europe when I say you not welcome.  Angie says I am being too nice and if you do come she may have to invade Poland to distract the voters.

Royally yours,

Terry at Westminster

Dear Donald:

Just wanted to say thanks for making us look like the sane and thoughtful ones.  And even more thanks for making  us no longer the most deplorable persons in government.

Senatorially yours,

Teddy C in Texas

Little Marco in Florida

Dear Donald:

Your staf did not send me directions to when I will be woking and now I cannot find my officer building.  I know I am Secretary of somethin but I keep forgettin what it is.  I know Kellyanne is not doing much these das so could you ask her to tell me where to go.  And tell her I mean it this time, last time I ask her directly and she sent me to Pismo Beach.  PS, can you get someon on your staff to sho me how to use Spell Check.

Signed:

Betsy the Lost (in more ways than one) in DC

Dear Donald:

Still looking for that job.  I can't stay here much longer, the tar and feathers crowd is getting restless.  and just for the record, I hate meatloaf.

Desperately seeking job,

Spurned in Trenton