Ivanka Trump Sits in For Daddy at G 20 Summit

And Does Not Make Things Worse!

Since the real news is so depressing here is news of things that didn’t happen, but could have.

1. “I know nothing about no foreign policy” Ivanka Trump took over her father’s seat at the G 20 Summit for a little while.  Of the 19 other participants, 12 didn’t notice that she had any more knowledge than her father,  5 thought she was a comedian and part of the entertainment and 2 didn’t notice because they were wrapped up in substantive issues.

2. Republican Senators are reported to be furious that constituents want them to vote the way the people desire rather than take direction from House Speaker Paul Ryan on a health care plan.  Having to answer to the voters is new to most GOP Senators and almost all of them said they had no idea that what voters want actually means something.

3. It has been reported but not confirmed that Trump supporters from West Virginia were flown to Poland to clap for Donnie during his speech.  “Where else were we going to get people who didn’t throw rotten tomatoes at the President” spokesperson Kellyanne Conway said.

4. At the beginning of their talks Vald the Putin told Trump he was a great man and that the reason Russia did not interfere in the election is that a great man like Trump didn’t need help.  After that Trump told Putin, whatever you say, goes, and can you give me pointers on how to jail journalists.

5. Democrats are reported to be revising their guidelines for selecting candidates and may require those seeking a nomination from the Party to actually know something about politics, government or policy.

6. For the first time since 2012 an actual reporter actually attended a Nancy Pelosi news conference.  The joy in the former Speaker’s office was muted when it was leaned the reporter was actually looking for the bathroom.

7. Republicans are studying whether or not they can repeal the health care taxes on the very wealthy twice, and so tell the Koch Brothers that they delivered 200% on their pledge to protect billionaires from supporting things like national defense, health care and anti-poverty programs.

8. Former Speaker Nancy Pelosi was initially thrilled when a voter approached her in a restaurant and gushed about how much he admired her work.  The joy subsided when it was learned that the voter thought Ms. Pelosi was the star of That Girl on tv and later played somebody’s mother on Friends.

9. Trump apparently told members of the G 20 at their summit that with every new dollar they spend on defense they would get a 1% discount on the initiation fee at a Trump golf club.